If you do not like my food, or knowledge, you will probably not be on my friends list, nor will you return of your own free will. I would rather spend my time with like minded people. For the others who do not want to hear or share the message and the knowledge, thank you for not returning and wasting our time. We have come to a point in our lives where we do not want to spend time with people we do not like nor want to be with. It’s a good thing, very liberating.

This past weekend, I was blessed to prepare all of the food for a Rehearsal Dinner and much of the food for a Wedding Dinner in honor of my son and new daughter! It was not my job to retrain the guests’ palates, and in reality some people don’t feel too well when they start eating healthier foods. I fixed normal meals that I felt would be enjoyed by my guests. Oh,I snuck in a few things: I served real butter with the rolls, which many consider a luxury. I used Sucanat in the salad dressing because having tried it both ways, no one in our family can tell a difference and it really helps my husband. I used real cream in the Chicken Veronese, because I cook with real ingredients. But I also made “normal” cupcakes and brownies for Friday night and 7 “normal” cheesecakes with toppings like homemade cherry topping, pecan praline, and an actual oreo crust on two of them. I laughed as I finished my baking for the weekend. I had used exactly one bag of white sugar; I was neither lacking one Tablespoon, nor did I have one Tablespoon left!

My point is that we share the level appropriate, not only for the interest of the parties involved but for the amount of influence we have over them. A few of the guests at the wedding actually eat closer to the way we do, yet all were gracious and I heard not one complaint! Some of us were joking on Sunday at church that we looked forward to eating *normally* – normally for US that is – as we returned home at the end of the festivities.

My parents live locally, and so they understand much of the way we eat, because they need to understand that there are things I do not want them to feed my chidren. (They have no respect for the way we eat, mind you, just an understanding. My 86yo father thinks raw veggies or even steamed veggies are as scary as raw meat – literally!) I can be gracious about the occasional treat, but war would erupt if they ever fed them a pink packet, and they know it. My husband’s parents are not local, however, so there is no reason to make a huge issue with the regarding what we will and won’t eat. There are many reasons why I might take a small amount or even avoid certain foods, but we can usually find enough to keep us going. Of course, none of us have actaul food allergies; my husband does fall asleep nearly instantly if he eats sugar, white flour, etc.

One last thought is that we set the best example by sharing our lives with others on a regular basis. To regular church potlucks, I absolutely take the best and healthiest dishes I can! I always offer to bring part of the food when we are invited guests, not so much to make sure there is something I want to eat as to make sure we don’t overburden our friends with 14 extra mouths to feed:-) We spent a long weekend at our new daughter’s parents’ home over New Years last winter; it was their engagement weekend. Her mom is a gracious and kind hostess who was very happy to host all of us for every meal over the long weekend, but her cooking is 180 degrees different from ours – all carbs, pancakes from a mix, etc. After two days without any green vegetables, I was having intestinal issues that were starting to bother me:-/ She asked me to run to the store on the third day for her, so as a “treat” I brought back a whole bunch of fresh veggies from the store and cut them up for a veggie tray. She seemed a little surprised as she had put out snacks (processed), but her greatest surprise was when the whole thing was polished off in less than ten minutes! Her daughters are a little leery of raw vegetables, cooked ones too mostly, but they are learning since being around all of us! My greatest joy was as I was cutting everything up, and my second son asked why in the world I would slap a grown man’s hand (his:-) for stealing veggies!! A good laugh, and a great reminder that if you raise them to love real food, they will.

My example: Some months ago a woman who makes everything from scratch asked me to watch her kids over lunch. She sent lunch (good start) but she didn’t emphasize her desire the children eat only what she brought, so I interpreted it as an effort to be less of a burden.

Her children made comments (I hope my children never make): One rejected something I made because “I never eat store bought eggs” (her sibs had no complaints, so it made her look elitist/picky), another acted (as in, over-acted, I can’t believe I was the first place they’d seen this) surprised when I pulled a jar of salsa front the fridge: “You BUY salsa?” and other things to make distinctions between our eating styles (and I’m not even all SAD).

The difference I want to teach my kids is to either pull the health distinction, and make a point of it based on us and *our* bodies, or just suck it up for the 2-6 meals/month we eat away from home.

I would only be willing to do the former when I have reached the “level” that I was consistently eating that way at home, and I know I’m not there yet.

Some people really have heartier constitutions and seem to survive comfortably on less revelation, so I want me and my family to be willing to eat “anything” — to some extent — so food isn’t an “issue”.

One difficulty I see as a hospitality-oriented person, is that I know other people also wish to serve and be hospitable. If I deny them that opportunity because we don’t yet have the relational bridge that will let me explain my “special eating”, I miss something I think is more critical: “Isn’t life more important than food?”

So far (and I recognize I’m only beginning) I see it as I see dealing with my in-laws: This is a foray into another culture. As a result, the focus is on the relationship: you just eat what is put in front of you. (Or you don’t eat, but you recognize it holds a legitimate risk of offending.)

Anybody here ever imagined the scenario of eating grubs as a part of first-contact with an unreached people group? Would you eat or refuse to eat? (I still don’t know) but I try (try) to be respectful.

And, oh, hi. I’ve just discovered the amazing world of whole-food blogging in the last week and I’m reeling. Thanks for having such thorough, experience-based content on-line. It is a great encouragement.

Before we moved, I had a few friends that were just getting into what I consider to be “healthy” eating (as opposed to low-fat foods, etc). Although I consider myself a newbie compared to most of the Real Food bloggers I know, I was definitely the “weirdest” among them. I tried not to preach but I just loved to share the things I was doing. They were all loving and took my talking as enthusiasm and not as reprimands on their choices so I was lucky then too because I probably should have shown more discretion in my critiques.

Family is probably the trickiest because I don’t want to rock the boat. Since it has just been me and my husband, I’ve been willing to put aside any differences I have for the week or two a year we spend with my in-laws and eat whatever they serve – a very SAD diet. My husband and I will often volunteer to cook a meal or two while we are visiting. I do so more as a thank you gesture than anything but I use the opportunity to cook something healthy that isn’t so unusual that they won’t like it. I guess I think the relationship is more important than the nutrition – however, I’m not sure how I will feel in a year when my baby starts to eat!

My sister-in-law, who has a lot of digestive/constipation issues, felt wonderful after eating “our” food for a weekend. She thought it was very cleansing

My grandmother, who is a diabetic, really enjoyed that she could eat “our” food, but still tried to send us home with a sack full of Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pie’s. I think she was a little upset at first that we wouldn’t take them, but I tried to explain to her (even though she should already know as a diabetic) that we feel so much better when we are putting God’s foods in our bodies (and not processed junk)!

The hardest part is to share by example, because I want to blab about how wonderful it is all of the time.

For me, it was difficult not talking about what I felt to be soooo important. For years I was troubled by my inability to just get someone to engage in a discussion about our health let along actually have some type of positive impact. For example, in the last several years, I have only found one person interested in taking some kefir grains and I am surrounded by individuals suffering some serious issues concerning their digestive tracts. Another example, several years ago, I ruined a lifelong friendship when I refused to support a friend giving soda pop to their 4 year old constantly. I said my peace one to many times and she said she’d had it with me-=we rarely speak even years later.

What I found that has given me a good sense of peace in all this is from the book of Mark. If Jesus, who is offering quite a prize, can simply let a young man walk away without chasing him down and arguing His points virtues, so should I. So, I never, ever push any discussions anymore and am peacefully allowing friends and family to “walk” from the offering of…well….whatever it is we are offering here.

As there where many disciples with diverse personalities, so to are there many styles among us. This is only my view and way of handling life and is not meant to be a model for anyone. I respect everyone’s approach to life and style regardless of whether it matches mine or not.

mostly at peace, wanndering around, sometimes lost but usually happy,

jed

I have a friend whose goal is to eat raw, and I just love talking about food with her. We do not have the same views on food, although I love the idea of eating more raw food but I also love my meat, but we can still enjoy the conversations, and I really appreciate that. I don’t have goats, but I love when my friend talks about her milking goats. As long as we do not make food our idol, I think it is fun as women and homemakers to share what we learn with eachother. Passionate Homemaking has a good article about not making food an idol.

I do like the idea of bringing healthy food to pot lucks, and then if someone asks you for the recipe, you will have a reason to share how that particular food is prepared. And then if they are interested, you can share more. I usually just take the easy way and point people to your blog or to Nourishing Traditions. Your blog and others like it do fill a need to talk about this subject with like-minded people.